Gas Station Lovin’

I’ve officially regressed back into my man-retarded ways. I was getting good there…picking them up left and right, dating, smooching, flirting, laughing and loving. Then I think the last one just exhausted me, and ever since, I’ve been a little A-sexual. I need to snap the hell out of it though. Monday, I ruined a perfectly good chance that just about came and slapped me in the face…

The summer Amanda and I lived together; we were always running about, meeting new people and partying with neighbors or randoms that we picked up at Golden Gardens. One particular random sticks out to me because I Amanda and I have a photo taken with him and he has a bright red t-shirt on with a fishhook on the front and some clever saying about hookers. I ran into the said random approximately six months ago while grocery shopping at Safeway on lower Queen Anne. The two of us caught eyes a couple times until he finally came up to me in the meat department and said, “If this grocery store is a meat market, you must be the prime rib…”

Just joking. He didn’t say that. But he did ask me if I went to Western, and we had a small chat about hanging out a couple summers back. I small-talked with him for a bit, then we parted ways, and I really didn’t think anything of it.

Monday, I was coming home from work and stopped to get gas at the Chevron station on way south 99. I pulled into a stall, and the guy pumping gas at the stall in front of me was the same random guy. Except this time, he looked a whole lot cuter than I remember thinking he was. I smiled at him while seductively throwing away the garbage from my car. (Come on! I’m just trying to make this gas station pick-up story sound more sexy time.) “Did you go to Western?” He asked again. I’m glad I did, otherwise I think he’d run out of pick-up lines. I chatted with him for a bit, but was honestly in a hurry to get home, make dinner and go to belly dancing. Flirting with someone was the last thing on my mind. I had just come from sitting in front of a computer screen for eight and one-half hours. Obviously, human interaction was not on my list of things to accomplish that day. He asked me if I lived with a roommate or a boyfriend, and I replied, “I live with a Sarah.” He full on laughed at me, “You live with A Sarah?!”

God. I’m such as idiot. He kept talking, telling me that my car was cute and it suited me. He was clearly flirting with me. But, I could barely form words out of my mouth. I eventually walked away mid sentence and said, “Have a good night!” He looked a little crestfallen and walked into the mini mart to pay for his gas.

I got into my car and kicked myself all the way home. Why did I act so retarded. Why didn’t I get his number, why didn’t I casually say, “We should hang out some time,” like I always do?! Shit. He was the cutest, most normal boy I’ve interacted with in a long time.

I even tried to stalk him on MySpace when I got home. But, to no avail. Damn! I was SO prepared to tell people when they asked, “Oh. We met at a gas station.”

Next time I run into him, I’m throwing myself at him completely. Better start practicing…

Currently Feeling: Antsy to get off work and drive home in the sunshine.
Currently Anticipating: Gossiping with the ladies over dinner tonight.
Currently Hating: That I spent a big chunk of the only money I had at Trader Joe’s last night. That place is SO addicting!

Self-Af-FIRM-ation

Is it just me, or are some of you starting to feel the bathing-suit-season-is-upon-us itch!? Recently, the sun has come out and it’s even starting to warm up a bit. Daylight-Savings has allowed for the sunlight to linger longer into the evening, and I’ve started having Memorial Day weekend conversations and plan-making with a few of my friends. All of which include a boat, bathing suits and drinking in the eastern Washington sun.

So now I’m starting to feel a little panicky. It won’t be long before we have to say goodbye to jeans, sweaters, jackets, and boots. I’ve already started pulling a Capri or two out of the closet and sprang for that tanning package last week. Inevitably, I’ve started checking myself out a little more in the mirror after showering…blech. Winter allows for us all to become a little soft. And I’m dreading try to firm myself back up again. Why can’t I just be one of the naturally lithe women? Damnit!

Ok, ok. Today marks the approximate two-month mark till Memorial Day. Hardly enough time to see the results I want, which means I need to start working out again, like yesterday.

I guess I’ll start this evening by pumping-up my ab ball and trying to do some sit-ups in front of America’s Next Top Model. I mean, that’s a start right?

Currently Feeling: Squishy but excited for the sun again!
Currently Anticipating: Being less squishy and seeing the sun again!
Currently Listening To: LCD Soundsystem and Fujiya & Miyagi—the two CDs I bought yesterday. SO good!

It’s an Easter Candy Face-Off

I’m sure most of you have noticed that it’s that time of year again—Easter Candy Bonanza—my favorite time of year!

Most people complain about Hallmark and how they’ve commercialized a lot of holidays such as Valentine’s Day and Christmas, which apparently detracts from the original meaning and blows the holiday way out of proportion. Well, I’m not gonna lie, I’m thankful to Hallmark for making something of a holiday that I wouldn’t think twice about anyway. Well, besides to kneel by my bed at night at pray to God that six pound baby Jesus was born in his manger and then rose from the dead. But how are we supposed to celebrate that? By passing out those creepy Body of Christ wafers with a side of grape juice?

Nope. Hallmark did us a favor and completely fabricated a holiday surrounded with Easter bunnies, chocolate, marshmallows, and other sugary-sweet confections that I can’t get enough of. And now Easter is the second top-selling candy holiday, next to Halloween. Each year, Americans spend an average of $1.9 million on Easter candy. (Halloween is an estimated $2 million a year).

I’m not one to lean toward the sweeter side of things, and I’ve never had much of a sweet tooth, but Easter candy tickles my fancy. Most of you are privy to my O-B-S-E-S-S-I-O-N with Peeps. If you’re not, then you don’t even know who I am! I wait all year for them to appear on the shelves—all lined up in their neon yellow birdie perfection. I buy a couple packages, slit the plastic open, then let them sit for a couple days till they get nice and stale. Bizarre, I know, but I’m not the only person I’ve ran across who does this. Peeps are fantastic. The Seattle Times has even started a peep contest, where one can dress up a peep and send it in to win a prize. Check out last year’s entries here.

The wonderment of Easter candy doesn’t stop at Peeps and all their glory. I’m in love with Cadbury Cream Eggs, and those little Cadbury chocolate eggs with the candy shell. In fact, I ran across a blog that compared the Cadbury Mini Eggs from Canada, England and America. I found it very informative. I’ll post it here for your reading pleasure:

The Candian Mini Eggs were darker in color, smaller, were a little pointier and were a smoother egg shape.

The US eggs were larger and lumpier and were more prone to those hairline fractures in the shell.

I expected them to be very much the same, but the difference in flavor were very apparent. The Candian eggs were much better, more chocolate flavor. In fact, after a Canadian egg and US egg tasted more like a creamy sweet thing than chocolate.

Above we have US on the left, Canada in the middle and the UK to the right.

The Canadian mini eggs were by far the winner, congratulations! The chocolate was simply a superior, tasty milk chocolate. The UK eggs were second with a mild chocolate flavor, and the US still taste like, well, creamy sweet something that isn’t quite chocolate. The US eggs have a meltier, gooier feel in the mouth than the UK eggs. I’m going to go so far as to say that in direct comparison the US eggs suck, they taste almost like bad white chocolate.

HURRY! We only have another couple weeks to enjoy the haven of Easter candy…

Currently Feeling: Really sad for Sarah.
Currently Anticipating: Yoga tonight.
Currently Wanting: A new iPod.

Refer to #31 for "Miller Mousse"

Tomorrow is St. Patrick’s Day, one of the best damn holidays of the year. Quite possibly my top favorite. There’s nothing that gets me through the last couple weeks of winter like dressing in all green and drinking all day long while dancing an Irish jig. In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, and the substance that I’m going to be imbibing from 10 a.m. till 2 a.m. tomorrow, (eh. 16 hours. I’ve done 17.), I’ve posted a little ode to beer, courtesy of MSN.com. Cause really, does it get any better than a good beer?

32 Things You Can Do With Beer

1. BATHE IN IT
Instead of sipping a beer, try soaking in it. Pour a bottle of German Badebier in the tub and lie back for a real bubble bath.

2. PUT OUT A FIRE
Although certainly not as effective as a real fire extinguisher, a can or bottle of beer can mimic one if none is available. Simply shake and spritz. After all, beer is mostly water. This works on small grill flare-ups, and some people have been known to carry an emergency can in their car in case of engine fire. Or at least that’s what they tell the state troopers.

3. MARINATE MEAT
Beer is slightly acidic — and that makes it an excellent meat tenderizer, says Linda Omichinski, R.D., a nutritionist. This allows you to enjoy leaner cuts that otherwise might be too tough. Beer also won’t alter the meat’s flavor as much as wine- and vinegar-based marinades do. Poke a few holes in the meat, put it in a Tupperware container (we know you have them) or a large resealable bag, and add beer. (English ale is great for beef.) Marinate in the refrigerator for a few hours or, better yet, overnight. Do not drink the marinade.

4. POLISH POTS
In days of yore, the last bit of beer from spent kegs was collected and used to polish the copper vats in breweries. Greg Smith, general manager of the Idaho Brewing Company, is keeping the tradition alive by using beer to put a shine on the copper-top tables in his Idaho Falls establishment. “Because of its acidity,” he explains, “you can just pour some on, let it sit for a while, then wipe it off. It also works well on Revere Ware pots.”

5. MAKE BEER BARBECUE SAUCE
Ingredients:
1 medium Spanish onion, diced
1 medium banana pepper, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 Tbsp capers
5 ripe tomatoes, diced
1 small can tomato paste
1/3 c each wine vinegar, olive oil, soy sauce, brown sugar
1 Tbsp balsamic vinegar
2 Tbsp each Worcestershire sauce, Tabasco, honey, Dijon mustard, horseradish, oregano
2 Tbsp fresh ground pepper
1 tsp cuminDash of ground clove
12 ounces amber ale or porter

Combine all ingredients in a large saucepan and boil for 10 minutes. Lower heat and simmer about 4 hours until thickened. Cool and refrigerate for 24 hours so the flavors can meld. Then baste everything but the dog with it.

6. SHAMPOO HAIR
Not only is beer the remedy for a dull party, it’s also the cure for dull hair. Dump a cup into a small saucepan and bring it to a boil over medium heat. Let it reduce until there’s 1/4 cup left. This removes the alcohol, which can dry hair. Let the beer cool, then mix it with a cup of your favorite shampoo. Pour it into an empty shampoo bottle, then wash and rinse as usual. It’ll give your hair more shine and luster.

If you don’t like to cook, the Dogfish Head Craft Brewery in Lewes, Delaware, sells 10-ounce Beer Shampoo bars (made with its pale ale) that’ll put a nice head on your head. The brewery also makes Beer Soap from its chicory stout. Each bar costs $6 (plus shipping) and can be ordered at www.dogfish.com or (888) 836-4347.

7. LOOSEN RUSTY BOLTS
Pour some beer on them and wait a few minutes. The carbonation may help break up the rust.

8. CLEAR UP BROWN SPOTS IN YOUR LAWN
According to Andrew Lopez, a professional gardener, the fermented sugars in beer stimulate plant growth and kill fungi. He recommends spraying either home brew or Rolling Rock (both are chemical-free) on those annoying brown spots in your lawn. (Either that, or just stop peeing there.) “The grass will absorb the sugar in the beer and draw energy from it,” Lopez explains.

9. STEAM CLAMS OR MUSSELS
Fill a large steamer pot with equal parts water and beer, then bring to a boil. Steam the randy little mollusks until their shells open. Couldn’t be simpler. The beer imparts a nice flavor.

10. PASS A KIDNEY STONE
As you’ve undoubtedly noticed, beer is a diuretic. It helps flush the kidneys and bladder. This can be beneficial if you’re suffering from a bladder infection or kidney stone. “You can drink water or cranberry juice,” explains Dr. Alexander, “but beer also works. It helps dilate the ureters [the tubes connecting the kidneys and bladder], which may help you pass a stone quicker and easier. Plus, the alcohol will take the edge off the pain.” But don’t drink beer if you’re taking antibiotics or narcotic pain medications. You’ll render the drugs useless and make yourself sick.

11. BOIL SHRIMP
Open three 12-ounce bottles of Yuengling Premium or a comparable mild pilsner and pour them into a large soup pot. Wait for the beer to go flat (about 2 hours), then add 1/4 cup Old Bay Seasoning and 2 tsp ground turmeric (to turn the shrimp a rich yellow). Bring to a boil over medium-high heat, then cook for 5 minutes.
Meanwhile, rinse 2 pounds of extra-large raw shrimp in cold water and drain. Add them to the pot and stir. Cover and cook for 5 minutes, no more. Quickly remove the shrimp using a large slotted spoon. Serve immediately with cocktail sauce and, you guessed it, more beer. This same recipe makes great lobster, but cook it for 12 to 15 minutes.

12. KILL SLUGS
Gather a few empty salsa jars (or similar wide-mouth containers) and fill them a third of the way with cheap beer. Then bury them about 15 feet from your garden, girlfriend, or whatever you’re trying to protect. Make sure the rims are almost level with the soil surface. For some reason, slugs love beer. They’ll find the traps, drop in, and drown. Do this in the evening, let them party all night, and give them an honorable burial in the morning.

13. FIND DUE NORTH
Okay, here’s the scenario. A bit far-fetched, we admit, but look who’s going to be our next president. Let’s say you’re hopelessly lost in the wilderness, and all you have is a can of beer, a sewing needle, a small bowl, and a pair of extra-large silk panties. (Because this is a matter of life and death, the camp counselor should give hers up.) First, open the beer, pour some into the bowl, and let it go flat. (Better drink the rest; this may not work.) Next, magnetize the needle by stroking it repeatedly in one direction with the panties. This will generate a charge of static electricity. Then float the needle in the beer. When it stops, it’ll be pointing in a north-south direction. Now get outta there!

14. SOOTHE TIRED FEET
Pour a couple of cold ones into a bucket and soak your dogs. “Ice-cold beer with lots of carbonation can be soothing for tired feet,” says Dr. Alexander. Stop at two; you don’t want to start staggering.

15. MAKE A BEER SLIDE
Forget volleyball and croquet. At your next party, lay a large vinyl tarp on a slope, then make it slick with lots of beer. Have your friends strip down to their underwear or swim trunks, get a running start, and slide downhill on their butts.

16. LOWER YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE
John Palmer, a hypertensive home-brewer and engineer in Monrovia, California, puts a handful of dried hops or hops pellets (available at any home-brew store) in a coffeemaker and brews them with hot water. It makes for a bitter tea, but he claims it brings his blood pressure back to normal within 10 minutes by dilating the capillaries. “There may be something to it,” says Dr. Alexander. “A person who’s intoxicated is usually flushed and sweaty. Some ingredient is dilating the blood vessels, which, in turn, lowers blood pressure.” We don’t advocate this as a replacement for medication, though.

17. TRICK A CHEAP LANDLORD
Live in an apartment where the landlord pays the heat bill and sets the thermostat pretty low? Ice up a can of beer in the freezer, then set it atop the lockbox that encloses the thermostat. The cold from the beer will trick the thermostat into thinking the temperature has dropped so it’ll turn the heat on.

18. BAKE BEER BREAD
You already know how to put a bun in the oven. Now it’s time to go all the way. Here’s a healthful, foolproof recipe for high-fiber beer bread from the book Tailoring Your Taste, by nutritionist Omichinski:

Ingredients:
2 3/4 c all-purpose flour
2 Tbsp each sugar, baking powder
1/4 c ground flaxseed1 tsp each salt, dried basil, dried rosemary, thyme
1/2 c unsalted sunflower seeds
1 Tbsp cooking oil
12 oz beer, at room temperature

Mix all the dry ingredients. Add oil and beer. Stir until dough is just mixed. Put dough in a greased 9x5x3-inch loaf pan. Bake at 375 F for 45 minutes or until nicely browned. Remove from oven and let bread cool in pan for 10 minutes. Remove from pan to cool some more.

19. CATCH MICE
Slugs aren’t the only pests with a fatal attraction to beer. According to Neil Herbst, owner of the Alley Kat Brewing Company in Edmonton, Alberta, you can also trap mice with it. He recommends setting out a few small pails or bowls of beer (his competitors’, never his own), with a small ramp leading up to the lip. The mice will be attracted by the smell, hop in, drink their fill, then be unable to climb out.

20. TIE A FLY
This tip is from the book Curiosities of Ale and Beer, published in 1889: Mix beer, chimney soot, walnut leaves, and a little powdered alum in a small pot. Bring to a boil, then chill. Dipping any natural materials you’re using in this solution prior to tying is supposed to make for a tighter, more attractive fly. No promises as to whether it will catch more fish, though.

21. CURE INSOMNIA
Greg Smith, author of The Beer Drinker’s Bible, says women often show up at his brewery asking to buy not his beer but the hops he uses to brew it. “They sew it into pillows,” he explains. “The smell of it is supposed to be a sleep aid, especially for colicky babies. I’ve never tried it, but we get enough requests that there must be something to it.” Hops is a type of flower, though, so be careful if you have allergies.

22. MASSAGE YOURSELF
A full can of beer is a great self-massage tool, according to Dori Love-Bentley, a certified massage therapist. For instance, take off your shoes and roll a can underfoot. Or put one in the crook of your back or between your shoulder blades and lean back against a wall, rolling it around as you do so. It works just about anywhere — quads, glutes, neck, calves. “The pressure loosens up muscle tissue,” explains Love-Bentley, “and encourages bloodflow to the area.”

23. CALM AN UPSET STOMACH
Sipping on a highly carbonated beer can settle a stomach just like Seven-Up or Sprite can. Plus, the alcohol helps buffer pain. “I’ve never seen a true medical study supporting this,” says Dr. Alexander, “but I have patients tell me it works. The only time you have to be careful is if you have an ulcer or gastritis. Alcohol can inflame that.”

24. BUILD YOUR NEXT HOME
Earthship, a house in New Mexico, has walls made of empty beer cans and concrete. Amy Duke, a spokeswoman, explains that instead of using forms for the cement, builders put down alternating layers of mortar and cans. You can do the same to create retaining walls for gardens and other landscaping. Earthship also contains a thermal-mass refrigerator that uses full cans of beer as insulation. The cans line the walls of the unit, helping keep the temperature constant while minimizing energy usage. A ceiling vent allows frigid desert air to flow in during the night. The beer absorbs this cold, but never freezes because of its alcohol content. When the hatch is closed during the day, the beer releases the coolness. The same thing happens when you open one and drink it.

25. COOK RICE
Rinse 1 cup jasmine rice in water. Do it twice more, then drain well. Next, dump the rice into a medium-size pot and add 12 ounces of beer. (A nut-brown ale works well.) Bring the mixture to a boil, turn the heat to low, and cover the pot. Simmer for 20 minutes, then remove from the stove and cool for an additional 10 minutes. The rice won’t be lumpy, and it’ll have a nuttier flavor — just like you after you eat it.

26. STOP SNORING
If your log-sawing is ripping a hole in your marriage, try this simple remedy: Get a pocket T-shirt and a 6-ounce mini-can of beer. Put the can in the pocket and fasten it closed with a safety pin. Just before you go to bed, put the shirt on backward. Research shows that you’re more likely to snore when resting on your back. This little setup prevents you from rolling over. Plus, come morning, you won’t have to get out of bed for breakfast.

27. BUILD A PLANE
No doubt about it, Duane Mathis is just plane nuts. A pilot and aircraft aficionado, he started building model airplanes out of beer cans about 10 years ago. Now, at his Web site(www.bcairoriginals.com), he sells the plans for eight categories of beer-can planes, including vintage tri-wings, helicopters, Warhawks, and ones that actually fly. Brings new meaning to the term “getting buzzed.”

28. ROAST CHICKEN
To make “Swampman Dan’s Drunken Chicken,” buy a few medium-size whole birds and a six-pack of beer. Drink half a can of beer, cut off the top third of the can, and add 1 tsp salt, 1 tsp pepper, 1 tsp Worcestershire sauce, 2 Tbsp liquid crab boil, and 1 tsp creole seasoning.
Then shove the can into the chicken and place it in a secure, standing position on the grill. As the brew boils, it’ll intoxicate the bird with flavor. Takes about 1 hour.
Compliments of Swamp Cookin’ with the River People

29. ICE A HAMSTRING
Frozen or very cold cans of beer make great ice packs. Hold one against whatever is ailing you — a sore muscle, a sunburned neck, a pounding headache. With an Ace bandage, you can even wrap a frosty 16-ouncer against the back of your thigh. Or use a sweatband to strap a can near your elbow after a tennis match. “A metal can will transmit the cold very rapidly,” says Larry L. Alexander, M.D., medical director of Central Florida Regional Hospital’s emergency department. Just make sure to put some thin fabric between the skin and the beer can to avoid frostbite.

30. BUILD DELIGHTFUL PATIO FURNITURE
To start, you’ll need:
About 65 assorted beer caps
1-foot square piece of 1/4-inch plywood
Four, 1-to 1 1/2-inch-square, 18-inch posts
Four 12×2-inch strips of lattice
Four, 3-inch dry-wall screws
Some tacking nails
A tube of tub-and-tile adhesive

Simply screw the plywood to the posts, brace them with lattice as shown, and glue the caps to the top in whatever creative arrangement you like. Warning: Don’t leave the finished table out in the rain, because the caps will rust.

31. TAME A WILD HAIR
A few drops of beer is sticky enough to subdue any sudden uprising on your eyebrow or scalp that you spot in a barroom mirror. Just wet your index finger and demurely slick it down. Think of it as Miller mousse.

32. SCALE FISH
Nail or glue three or four beer caps to a sturdy piece of wood that’s roughly 6 inches long, 1 inch wide, and 1/2 inch thick. Keep the caps in a line and make sure the serrated edges are facing out. Then attack those fish.

Holy Wedding Season

I’m posting this as a fair warning—if you want to hang out with me, (I mean, why wouldn’t you, I’m pretty fantastic), you’ll need to book a month and a half in advance, starting in April. Why do you ask? I have six weekends in a row of wedding-related events. How dare you second-guess my popularity.

Now, I’m not going to go into detail about the woe is me, “Always a Bridesmaid Never a Bride” bit. I can say with absolute conviction that I’d sooner hang myself than get married this year. I still feel like I’m quite possibly 14 in the body of a 25-year-old. Marriage scares the shit out of me.

Nevertheless, I will be spending the greater part of April and May, celebrating my friends’ upcoming weddings. Here’s a brief schedule:

Holy wedding season. One can only hope that while this all sounds fun, it won’t break my bank. Cause if there’s any reason to buy tons and tons of liquor and booze, it’s one (or more) of your best friends getting married off. Yowza.

Currently Feeling: Like such a blogging slacker. Sorry! I’ve been so busy. I’ll be back on track here soon.
Currently Anticipating: If you’re even wondering what I’m looking forward to, you live on Mars.
Currently Hating: Cars. I hate them. They’re expensive.

The Latest and Greatest

Within the last couple months, I’ve been obsessed with KEXP. I can’t believe I’ve lived in Seattle my whole life and was never introduced to the wonderment of this radio station until just recently. I had noticed the bumper stickers on people’s cars around the city, but hated that every time I turned to the station, I had no idea who they were playing. However, I started listening to it at work, streaming live online. The Web site features a playlist that tells you every song they’re playing…every time I like a song, I check out who the artist is and, write it down. I can’t get enough. I’ve been introduced to so many new bands in the last couple months, and I have Post-It notes everywhere on my desk at work, listing this band, that song, this CD and so forth.

KEXP is good—really, really good.

Because I am obsessed with the station, it’s introduced to me a bunch of new bands and live shows I want to attend, and it gets me through my work day, I decided to pledge to their Winter Pledge Drive. KEXP is locally ran and supported by members, so there aren’t any commercials, and they rely on support from the money they raise by their listeners. It’s the first time I’ve given money to support a cause, and I’m not going to lie, I feel sort of popular about it. I can’t wait until my KEXP member T-shirt and member card comes in the mail. And when you pledge, it not only supports the radio station, but you get discounts at tons of local clothing stores, restaurants, bars and cd stores around town.

So, if you’re into rock music, listen to KEXP. They’re awesome. And, attend any or all of the following shows with me…I’m looking for a live-music buddy for:

April 14:90.3 KEXP presents The Long Winters at Showbox
Doors: 8PMAge: 21+Tix: Ticketmaster Presale!Saturday April 14th – The Showbox presents THE LONG WINTERS. $15.00 advance at Ticketmaster. Doors at 8pm. 21+. Tickets on sale Friday January 26th at 10am. Internet presale beginning Wednesday January 24th at 10am and ending Thursday January 25th at 10pm; password is “kexp”.

April 21:90.3 KEXP presents Junior Boys at Chop Suey
Doors: 9PMAge: 21+Tix: Ticketswest.com4.21 Saturday Neumos and 90.3 KEXP Present at Chop Suey JUNIOR BOYS with Special Guests. tickets are $12 advance.

May 5:90.3 KEXP presents Tapes N Tapes at Neumo’s
Doors: 8PMAge: All AgesTix: TicketsWest.comGeneral Admission. All Ages $13.00 tickets available.

May 13:90.3 KEXP presents Peter Bjorn and John at Neumo’s
Doors: 8PMAge: 21+Tix: $15 advance at TicketsWestWith Special Guests.

Currently Feeling: A little queasy from those chocolate martinis and pots o cheese last night.
Currently Anticipating: Lebowskifest tonight and our housewarming party on Saturday.
Currently Loving: The 10 new pairs of shoes I’ve purchased. Okay, I know. I’m stopping now.

Accident-Prone or Unlucky in Life?!?

Sarah and I have survived the moving and unpacking process, and our house is almost ready for our housewarming party, stave a few minor details. We’ve now hung pictures, and even spent Sunday painting everything we could think of with spray paint. The place is wonderful—I love our living room, all the natural sunlight, and having a bedroom again and someone to talk to!

However, I’ve already managed to be a total junk show. Seriously, am I accident-prone and have never realized it!? Super unlucky situations are always occurring when I’m around.

Friday night I came home after an all-nighter at the bars with Amanda, and went to the bathroom. I flushed the toilet like any normal person, and reached above into the medicine cabinet for a bobby pin. I accidentally knocked my deodorant out of the cabinet, and since it happens to be located above the toilet, the deodorant fell into the toilet right as it was flushing. And, of course, sucked right up the pipe. I mean, what else would happen? It’s me. Shit like this always happens.

The toilet wouldn’t flush, so I went to bed and decided I’d deal with it in the morning. Well, we continued to pee into the toilet, and sorry for details, but nothing else was necessary. For me at least. Guess I’m used to being a little self-centered still. I wanted to relax on Saturday, which didn’t include leaving the house or getting dressed till it was time to go out again Saturday night. Honestly, getting a plunger and taking care of the toilet didn’t cross my mind. The situation became dire, and we decided that Vanessa could pick up a plunger on her way over to our house. But, by the time 8 o’clock rolled around, Sarah was doubled over on her bed, felt like she was going to puke, and Vanessa was still a half-hour out. Sarah was forced to go to Safeway to use the restroom and wander around until she felt better again. Needless to say, I don’t think Sarah was too happy that I dropped the deodorant and flushed it up the pipe. She was unable to come out with us that night.

I was quick to grab our ESL landlord on Sunday to try to get the problem fixed. He came and checked it out, laughed that anyone could be as stupid as me, and told us, “I fix tomorrow. You can pee, but no poo!” AND, he disclosed that there was a bathroom located in the laundry room, and that there are, “lots of magazines down there!” How helpful is that?

Saturday, in the midst of the toilet debacle, I decided to make pea soup for dinner and lunch for the rest of the week. I love split pea soup and have been craving it lately, so wanted to tackle making homemade pea soup. I carefully followed the directions on the back of the package, which included boiling the bag of peas in 12 cups of water for one-half hour. My HUGE soup pot was full to the top, so I didn’t think the water would boil down. I enjoyed a half hour of MySpacing. Well, I think it was a half hour, I didn’t exactly pay very close attention to the time.

I was sitting on the couch, approximately 5 to 7 feet away from the kitchen, when I glanced up and realized that the kitchen was full of smoke and it was kinda starting to fill the whole dining room and seep into the living room. I quickly jumped up and took the pot off the stove. When I lifted the lid, smoke billowed out in heaps. I had burned close to a one-inch layer of beans on the bottom of the pot. Luckily, I wasn’t drunk or asleep this time, but our apartment still smelt like burned split peas and cigarette butts for two days, AND we couldn’t use our bathroom.

Poor Sarah. I really hope this is as bad as it’s going to get.

Currently Feeling: A need to shoe shop online all day long. I’m trying to fight it.
Currently Anticipating: Watching the two-hour premiere of America’s Next Top Model tonight. (I taped it.)
Currently Loving: The South Beach Sloppy Joes I made last night. So good!

I’m Out of Here Bitches!

It’s days like Friday that make me feel really happy to be alive.

The following is my weekend agenda:

• Free or majorly discounted drinks tonight at Marazul, a new restaurant in the Pan-Pacific Hotel. Sarah’s boyfriend Doug is the lead bartender there, but he just got what we all like to refer to as, “a real job.” So, tonight is his last night, and Sarah says he quote, “Is going to give the bar away.” You better believe that if anybody is talking about GIVING liquor away for FREE, I’ll be there. Names to drop: Amanda, who’s home from cruising, Adam, Kristen and Robin. I’ll let you know how the place is. At first glance, the menu seemed delicious and fairly inexpensive.

• General home improvement stuff with Sarah on Saturday. This includes, painting the dining room table, recovering the dining room chair cushions and hanging pictures on the wall. All very exciting stuff.

• Dancing with the ladies on Saturday night at Trinity, yet another new place for me. It’s nice to feel like I’m expanding my horizons in this city I feel like I know inside and out. We’re going all out—21-year-old style. This includes getting super dressed up just because we can. I’ve already started planning outfits in my head. I’m uber excited to shake my tush on the dance floor and hopefully stare at some beautiful men. Dance clubs aren’t ever really my scene, but they certainly are fun on occasion, and I have a hankering for some crazy dance beats.

• Possibly snowboarding with Larisa on Sunday.

And this was a weekend that I had nothing planned to do. Suddenly, it’s all filled up. Hopefully, I’ll still have a free moment to catch-up on some much-needed reading, rest and relaxation. It’s been a crazy couple of months, and I’m looking forward to settling back into a routine at the new homestead.

T.G.I.F.!

Currently Feeling: Ready to get the hec out of the office and sneak a nap and some Grey’s Anatomy in before heading out on the town tonight.
Currently Anticipating: The nights staying light later and later…I left work yesterday at 6:00 and it was still light!
Currently Reading: The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath. Perhaps I’ll be able to understand that old lady in our apartment building who stuck her head in the oven. (Inside joke for Sarah).

Let’s Get Some Shoes

I might have found the best thing know to all fashionable women—or perhaps the worst. You decide.

Women have a reputation for being obsessed with shoes. It’s true for most I know. It is never as simple as being a guy; we can’t have one pair of tennis shoes, one pair of dress shoes and one pair of casual shoes. We have to have the latest style—open-toes, wedges, slouchy boots. We have to have the right color to match our outfit—I own shoes in the following colors: brown, tan, white, black, orange, teal, pink, yellow, red, bronze, silver and gold. And that doesn’t even touch the printed shoes. In basic colors such as brown tan and black, I have boots, heels, wedges, flats, open-toed, close-toed, sandals, etc. It’s ridiculous.

“It’s really hard to walk in a single woman’s shoes—that’s why you sometimes need really special shoes!”

Today’s my Jeanniversary

Today marks the one-year date since I wrote my first blog. I’ve shared a lot of my personal feelings and opinions, current events I’ve thought interesting, crazy drunken stories and other random events in my life. While at times it seems a bit narcissistic, blogging has become an outlet for me—a way to share what I have bottled up inside. A big thanks to my faithful blog readers who read each and every one of my posts and care about what I have to say. Who knew that having multiple people (some you don’t even know, weird) reading what is basically your personal diary, could be so rewarding?

Since starting this Internet record of my life, I:

• Became a project manager at World Vision
• Bought a new car
• Bowled in three bowling leagues
• Took up belly dancing, bingo and a book club
• Jumped off at least two dating roller coasters
• Gave up carbs and sugar
• Became a mother to Stella
• Moved to a new apartment with Sarah
• Discovered a couple new awesome bars and restaurants in Seattle
• Traveled to Mexico
• Almost died in an apartment fire (twice)
• Seen at least seven good rock concerts (including the Rolling Stones!)
• Became a bridesmaid
• Made new friends, became closer to some old ones, and lost touch with others
• Read a million new books
• Made-out with a gay man
• Survived more than one unparalleled drinking binge in Eastern Washington
• Have learned to become a pretty good cook
• Attempted Internet dating

Wow. It’s amazing all that can happen in a year. And it’s incredibly entertaining and awesome to be able to look back and read about how I feeling at certain points in my life and how I was spending my time.

So, here’s to another year. I can only hope it’ll be as fabulous as the last, and that all of you will continue to support this hobby of mine.

Luv,
Jeanna